Writing is a solitary process, ideal for introverts, yet there are few actions more extroverted than baring your soul in a novel and sharing it with the world.
I wrote for decades, scribbling into notebooks alone in my room often at odd hours of the night, before making the slightest attempt at publication.
After committing to a leap from obscurity, I assumed rejection would be my stumbling block. Looking back, I am still not a big fan of rejection. Shocker, I know. But that wasn’t the most onerous emotional challenge. Exposure, the thing you need most as a writer, filled me with dread.
How a Pen Name Helped Me Take the Leap Into Publishing
I mitigated the problem by publishing my first novel under a pen name, creating an alternate persona with an amusing author bio (“Dr. Hirsch subsisted for the next three years by foraging gooseberries and licking the dew off spiny toads.”)
Interacting with bloggers and eventually with fans as David Z. Hirsh created an out-of-body experience, providing me a degree of separation necessary to function as a public novelist.
A funny thing happened on the way to the book festival: I acclimated. This was not an unfamiliar experience for me.
As a medical student, I flushed with dread before walking into a stranger’s room. I worried early on if being a physician was a good fit for me. Eventually, compartmentalization set in. I remained shy and awkward on my own time while the doctor version of me grew engaging and bold.
In the writing world, the pen-name version of me progressed in much the same way. As Dr. Hirsch, author of Didn’t Get Frazzled, a work of humorous medical fiction, I could blithely engage with complete strangers. Dr. Hirsch is fearless. I still blush in the face of his beguiling confidence. If only I could be more like that guy.
Faking Confidence Can Help You Gain Actual Confidence
When I published my second novel, I used my real name. This was a reasonable thing to do since Jake, Lucid Dreamer is in a different genre (coming-of-age/magical realism), but also, it was time. After two years of engaging with the world albeit hidden behind a pen name, I felt ready.
There’s nothing like the realization that you can master fake confidence to help you gain actual confidence. It’s like desensitization therapy. Keep pushing yourself out of your comfort zone a little bit at a time until your comfort zone expands to engulf your fear.
Writers Need to Use the “Butt Pillow”
As much as I enjoy hikes in the woods, I am most creative when least distracted. This means seated in the same room, on the same chair, in front of the same computer.
While good for creativity, the position is brutal on the coccyx. The problem: prolonged pressure on the perineum produces paresthesia (also alliteration, apparently).
The solution: the butt pillow. Officially known as “Pure Memory Foam Luxury Seat Cushion,” the butt pillow relieves pressure on the sciatic nerve to avoid painful tingling. This has been a game changer.
I even bring it with me to my children’s school concert performances so I can listen to the euphoniums bleat while I sit in squishy comfort.
Sometimes, You Have to Kill the Book
After writing for nearly two decades, I decided the time had come to put-up or shut-up and gathered my material into the Great American Novel. You know, the one that would propel me into the company of the literary elites, or maybe get me a book deal, or at least result in a stranger wanting to read it.
For a solid year, I researched agents and query letters, editing and formatting, and the myriad faces of marketing until I felt ready to take the plunge head first. If I was to fail, I would fail big.
And I succeeded! In failing big.
After all my efforts, I had acquired a folder of rejection letters and the unavoidable realization that my manuscript was nowhere near the level where I wanted it.
Instead of attempting yet another re-write, I went in another direction. I killed the book. For sure, this was my darkest moment. I couldn’t shake the feeling that my dream had died, too.
To try out my new life as a non-writer, I decided to go one week with no writing, no reading, and no idea what the future would bring, seven glorious stress-free days to catch my breath.
I lasted three. Then I wrote the first chapter of Didn’t Get Frazzled.
Indie Publishing Gives You a Level of Control Unattainable in Most Other Fields
After I finished the new book and worked with an editor, I put the book away until enough time had passed that I could review it with fresh eyes.
I took a day off work and read the manuscript out loud, in its entirety. When I finished, I was stunned. I had written something amazing, something I could be proud of, something that would outlive me.
The indie revolution guaranteed that I could share it with the world even if no agent wanted to join me (they didn’t—too narrow a genre). Indie publishing affords a level of control unattainable in just about any other field. Seriously, I have less autonomy as a physician.
So if I wanted to switch genres for my second novel and write a touching story about a 12-year-old boy who uses his lucid dreams as a means to trigger emotional healing after the death of a parent, then sure, why the heck not? Jake, Lucid Dreamer was born.
Numbers are Ephemeral…the Work Lives On Forever
What is it that you want out of life?
We rarely ask ourselves this question and even more rarely answer it honestly. Our judgment is clouded with what we think others want from us or what we think others have that we want.
But be honest, what is it that you want out of life? How do you define success? There is no correct answer, of course. We each have our own goals and even these can shift over time.
My goal is to tell the best story I can, the best way I know how. It’s easy to get distracted by sales or notoriety. This is how many others define success and this assumption is infectious.
But numbers are ephemeral, they wax and wane with indifference to your mental health. The work lives on forever.
Advice to a Young Writer: Be Honest About What You Want Out of It
My advice to young people looking to get into the writing game is to set reasonable goals. Also set unreasonable goals. Why not dream big?
But above all, be honest with what you want to get out of it and what you are willing to do to chase your dream. Stress is endemic to any field, and creative fields like writing are particularly intense.
Being true to yourself is the best way to remain tethered to reality. And sane. It will also blunt those inevitable setbacks on the way to success—however you chose to define it.
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After graduating from Wesleyan University, David J. Naiman obtained his medical degree at New York University School of Medicine and trained in the primary care internal medicine program at Johns Hopkins Bayview Medical Center. Writing nights and weekends, he published the award-winning #1 Amazon bestselling novel Didn’t Get Frazzled, a work of humorous medical fiction for adults, under the pen name David Z Hirsch.
From there, David turned to children’s literature to pursue the themes of family, friendship and the magic of childhood that continue to inspire him. Jake, Lucid Dreamer is his first middle grade novel.
When he’s not writing, David toils in the front lines of primary care, battling scourges like diabetes, heart disease, and insurance companies, although probably not in that order. He lives in Maryland with his wife and two sons. For more information on David and his work, please see his website and Amazon author page, or connect with him on Goodreads.
Jake, Lucid Dreamer: Twelve-year-old Jake has been suppressing his heartbreak over the loss of his mother for the past four years. But his emotions have a way of haunting his dreams and bubbling to the surface when he least expects it. When Jake learns how to take control in his dreams, he becomes a lucid dreamer, and that’s when the battle really heats up.
Using his wits to dodge bullies by day and a nefarious kangaroo hopping ever closer by night, Jake learns about loss, bravery, the power of love, and how you cannot fully heal until you face your greatest fear. This uncompromising novel is a magical yet honest exploration of emotional healing after a devastating loss.
Available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, IndieBound, and wherever books are sold.
2018 Purple Dragonfly Book Award First Place winner for Middle Grade fiction
2018 International Book Award Silver Medal Winner Readers’ Favorite for Coming of Age
As an introvert and aspiring author,
I relate to your article on so many levels. In fact I just wrote a blog post this morning about reclaiming my name instead of using a pen name. Jake, Lucid Dreamer sounds amazing and I look forward to reading your work.