Fear is blocking your writing…if you’ve made any of these statements recently:
Oh man, I’m just sooooo busy, I haven’t had time to get that story done.
Those stupid editors! They don’t know what’s good anyway, so I’m not going to try submitting.
Why do I feel so tired lately? I want to write but I just can’t seem to find the energy.
We’ve all used excuses like these from time to time. And when we use them, we fully believe them. We are busy, frustrated, and tired, and we have every right to be. The writing life isn’t easy, after all.
But, there’s usually something else going on here, too. These excuses aren’t really about being tired, or frustrated, or busy.
They’re about fear.
And until we’re ready to admit and face that, we’ll continue to make excuses and fail to become the writers we want to be.
Fear is Often at the Root of Every Writing Excuse
Dig a little deeper, and you’ll probably find that fear is at the root of every excuse you have for not writing, or not submitting, or not building your platform.
Fear that you don’t have what it takes, and that if you actually try to do these things, you’ll fail.
The problem is you don’t want to admit you feel this way, even to yourself. So you convince yourself something else is getting in the way.
Work takes up too much creative energy. Raising the kids is too exhausting. The market is ridiculously competitive, impossible to break into. You don’t have an adequate writing space or writing materials. The house desperately needs remodeling. You’ll get around to writing later.
Meanwhile, what’s really happening is that fear is stopping you, but often that knowledge is buried deep in your subconscious, where you can’t really access it.
Fear is Blocking Your Writing If You’re Not Writing
The truth of it is, even if you could wave a magic wand and immediately be relieved of all these issues, you’d immediately find something else that would stop you from writing, because the fear would still be there.
And you’d be just as convinced that it was the new problem to blame.
“I’ve found that the greatest threat to us writers,” writes author Jeff Elkins, “is not the well of creativity running dry or time running out before we can finish our latest work or some other writer stealing our million dollar idea. The greatest threat to us lives within us. It is our own fear of writing.”
Don’t believe it? Take a look at the following signs that fear is working its harmful spell on you.
5 Hidden Signs Fear Is Blocking Your Writing
1. You’re angry…at the market, the editors, the agents, the publishing industry, etc.
Anger is a common reaction to fear, particularly for men, but for women, too. To admit fear is to admit weakness, or vulnerability, and it’s hard to do that. Much easier to get angry and blame someone or something else.
Says clinical psychologist and author Leon F. Seltzer, Ph.D., “those of us who routinely use anger as a ‘cover-up’ to keep our more vulnerable feelings at bay, generally become so adept at doing so that we have little to no awareness of the dynamic driving our behavior.”
Look for signs of anger as they relate to writing. Are you spouting off to other writers about the lack of opportunities? Do you regularly bemoan the lack of openness you feel editors and agents show new writers? Do you get ticked off when you get a rejection and decide it’s just not worth it to keep trying?
These may all be signs of fear.
Seltzer adds, “this is how all psychological defenses work. Simply put, they allow us to escape upsetting, shameful, or anxiety-laden feelings we may not have developed the emotional resources—or ego strength—to successfully cope with.”
2. You’re “too busy” to write.
Ever notice that when you don’t want to do something, you decide you need to do something else? You don’t want to clean the house, so you decide you need to organize your files. Or you don’t want to go to a party, so you decide you’re not feeling up to it.
When you say you’re “too busy” to write, you’re using the same sort of avoidance technique. But I want to write! you may think, but in this case, your fear is making it seem like an undesirable activity. If you write and it’s not any good, obviously you’ll feel lousy, and who wants to feel lousy? So you avoid it.
“To escape from facing fear,” says blogger Fredric Lipio, “people fill their days, minds, and thoughts, with other things. It’s a distraction—to distract us from feeling fear….As long as the fear hides within us, we allow it to live.”
Fear is Blocking Your Writing Sign 3. You’re too tired to fit writing into your day.
Whereas some people become angry or excessively busy as a result of fearful feelings, others become tired. Psychologist Dr. Sarah Sarkis describes fear as a master of disguise, capable of morphing into a number of other emotions.
“Often the very parts of our personality we are most wedded to are derivatives of fear,” she writes. “And most of the time, because of the power of the unconscious, people are completely unaware of how these dynamics operate in their life.”
It makes sense that fear would feel like fatigue. After all, if you have to face something you’re afraid of, that takes way more energy than doing something you enjoy.
If you see your writing as something that scares you—because you’re not sure you’ll be “good enough”—it’s going to seem like a very taxing task to you.
No wonder the thought of doing it makes you feel worn out before you even start!
4. You “don’t care” anymore.
All writers go through periods where they throw up their hands. The whole fight to write well and then get that writing read can lead even the most devoted writer to consider giving up now and then.
If you’re burned out, take some time off. But if you’re caught up in an apathetic sort of attitude (I can’t get readers anyway, so why bother?), that’s probably fear talking.
CalmClinic writer Micah Abraham notes that “one of the most common symptoms of extreme anxiety is apathy.” The fear becomes so exhausting that in addition to feeling fatigued, it’s natural to begin to back away from feeling anything at all.
“Writing means dealing with the uncertainty of creating something new and then publishing it for other people to judge,” writes marketer and copywriter Henneke Duistermaat. “It’s exciting, but also scary. To write, we have to dance with our fears. We have to muster the courage to move forward despite our fears.”
Fear is Blocking Your Writing Sign 5. You have writer’s block.
“Writer’s block is a misnomer,” said author Tom Wolfe. “What’s called writer’s block is almost always ordinary fear.”
Sometimes writer’s block comes about because the story’s gone off the rails, and you have to figure out how to get it back on. But often, it’s simply the natural response to fear.
“Isn’t that what writer’s block really is?” writes journalist and author Suzy Spencer. “Fear that the words will reject us. Fear that the agents and editors will reject us. Fear that the readers will reject us. Fear that our families and friends will reject us because of what we write. Fear of letting the world (and our families and friends) read our true thoughts and real emotions. Fear of being vulnerable. Fear of being hurt. Fear that we’re really not good enough.”
That sums it up pretty well. If all this is weighing on your mind—and it often is, for most writers—no wonder we become “blocked” at the thought of writing.
Writers Must Face the Fear
If you recognize any of these signs in yourself, and you’re willing to admit that fear may be driving you, congratulations! You’ve just taken the first courageous step forward.
Now all you have to do is face that fear, and write anyway. Here are a few tips to help you do that.
- Give yourself permission to write badly—no one will see it until you’re ready.
- Ask yourself how you’ll feel if you allow your fear to control your writing destiny. Will you be okay with that?
- Remind yourself of what you enjoy about writing. Reconnect with your inner child and play on the page.
- Connect with other writers. We all know how destructive fear can be.
Do you have other ideas of how to conquer a writer’s fear?
Sources
Abraham, M. (2018, October 28). Apathy: Anxiety’s Unusual Symptom. Retrieved from https://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/apathy
Duistermaat, H. (2018, July 5). 21 Writing Fears: How I Learned to Dance With My Doubts. Retrieved from https://www.enchantingmarketing.com/writing-fears/
Elkins, J. (2017, October 23). 3 Tricks to Overcome Your Fear of Writing. Retrieved from https://thewritepractice.com/fear-of-writing/
Keyes, R. (2003). The Courage to Write: How Writers Transcend Fear. Holt Paperbacks.
Lipio, F. (2016, May 18). How Fear Disguises Itself In Our Lives. Retrieved from http://coachlippy.com/how-fear-disguises-itself-in-our-lives/
Sarkis, S. (2018, May 8). Fear: A Master of Disguise (by Dr Sarah Sarkis). Retrieved from https://www.heysigmund.com/a-master-of-disguise/
Seltzer, L. F. (2013, June 14). Anger—How We Transfer Feelings of Guilt, Hurt, and Fear. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201306/anger-how-we-transfer-feelings-guilt-hurt-and-fea
Spencer, S. (2018, June 1). Writer’s block is just writer’s fear. Here’s how to beat it. Retrieved from http://www.yellowbirdeditors.com/blog/2016/11/28/writers-block-is-really-just-writers-fear-heres-how-to-beat-it
this came along on the perfect day. I’m speaking tonight on roadblocks. I’d love to share your post.
I know that you know I read you every week and learn so much. Even after writing 50 books I still fight writing sometimes. My Tom’s been ill and a friend, none writer, said I’d just have to stop writing to take care of him. I realized that would be cutting me in half. So I’m burning midnight oil.
I’m giving away three of your new books as door prizes. Jodi
Sweet! I love hearing that, Jodi–makes everything worthwhile. Please feel free to share, and thank you so much on the books. My heart aches for you on Tom, but we writers need our writing. Don’t forget to take care of yourself during this tough time, but I imagine getting the writing in however you can is a big part of that. :O)